


I've Got This

by noirhound



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Everyone is starstuck by the star-spangled shithead, Except Tony, Gen, Happy Steve Bingo, Steve Rogers is a little shit, Tony Knows, Tony needs to calm down
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-09
Updated: 2018-09-09
Packaged: 2019-07-10 07:32:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15944693
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noirhound/pseuds/noirhound
Summary: Tony needs help getting out of a ticket. Fortunately, he's got a national icon in the backseat.





	I've Got This

Tony peers at the policeman over the rim of his sunglasses. “What do you _mean,_ ‘license and registration’?”

The policeman gives him an unamused look. “I mean, ‘show me your license and registration’.” Tony, scowling, fishes the documents out of the glove compartment and hands them over. Soon, the papers are returned, along with a ticket. Tony wrinkles his nose.

“Excuse me, but do you know who I am?” Tony asks, raising an eyebrow.

“No, I don’t, but I’d appreciate it if you just paid the fine and let us all move on.”

“Seriously?” Tony points to himself. “Tony Stark? Stark Industries? _Iron man?_ ” Recognition doesn’t flicker across the man’s face. The ticket wags insistently. “Okay, fine. One second.” He twists around to poke the unconscious man in the backseat. “Rise and shine, princess.”

Steve jolts awake. “I’m up!” he yells. He glances at the policeman, registers him, then glares at Tony. “Was he speeding again? I’m sorry, Officer,” says Steve, sitting up. The bullet holes in his abdomen are already closing. “I got shot, and he forgets that I’m genetically enhanced.” His dark blue suit is purple where blood seeped through.

“Oh my gosh, you’re Captain America,” whispers the officer.

Tony gawks. “ _Him_ you knew?”

The cop shrugs, looking starstruck. “My kid loves you,” he tells Steve. And then, “thank you for your service, sir.” _Why doesn’t he call_ me _sir?_ Tony wonders.

Steve waves away the compliment; modest bastard that he is. “Happy to do it. Is there going to be any trouble, Officer?” he asks. The cop shakes his head quickly and tears the ticket in two.

“For you, no trouble at all, sir. You have a good day.”

When they’re out on the highway, Steve speaks up. “I just saved you a couple hundred bucks. You’re welcome, Mister Billionaire-Playboy-Philanthropist.” And he leans back in his seat, folding his arms behind his head and looking smug.

"If you get even a spot of blood on my upholstery, you're going to get a fist up your ass."

"Ooh, _kinky._ "

Tony glowers at Steve through the rear view mirror. “Sometimes I really want to smack that helmet off your head.”

“Again, you’re welcome.”

**Author's Note:**

> Come yell at me on twitter @thanxolotl!!


End file.
